During my senior year in High School, I had the good fortune to date the daughter of Richard Knerr, the founder of Wham-O, the inventor of Hula Hoops, Silly Putty, Super Balls, Frisbee’s, and Slip & Slides (click here).

At six feet, she was the tallest girl in the school, and at 6’4” I was an obvious choice.

After the senior prom and wearing my tux, I took her to the Los Angeles opening night of the new musical Hair. In the second act, the entire cast dropped their clothes onto the stage and stood there stark naked. The audience was stunned, shocked, embarrassed, and even gob-smacked.

Those were the reactions I saw on Friday, when the April Nonfarm Payroll Report was released showing a gain of only 266,000 jobs. A million had been expected.

So, how does that work? Red hot ADP private jobs and a year low in Weekly Jobless Claims, but a horrific monthly Payroll report?

They say economic data can be “noisy”. This time it was positively cacophonous. The fact is that these data points were never created to handle times like this, the most disruptive in history.

When the data are useless, all you have to do is take a walk down Main Street. There are “Help Wanted” signs at virtually every business.

The data dissonance created a wild day in the markets on Friday. Bonds soared, causing ten-year yields to dive to 1.48%. Then they rallied all the way back up to 1.58%.

That was seen as the end of the two-month long rally in bonds, so stock took off like a rocket. Essentially everything went up, both cyclicals, banks, AND tech.

All those bond shorts you have been nursing since March? They are about to explode to the upside. The next leg down in the year-old bear market in bonds is about to begin.

And what about that 266,000-payroll report? If you didn’t get a million jobs print in April, then you’ll almost certainly get it in May. Stocks could well keep rally until then. That’s how traders are seeing it.

Just another reason to buy.

By the way, I learned one of the great untold business stories from Richard Knerr. When the Hula Hoop was first launched in 1957, sales went ballistic. Some 25 million were sold in the first four months.

The Hula Hoop was made of a plastic tube stapled together with an oak cork made in England. Since demand seemed infinite, Wham-O ordered 50 million corks. Then the republican party claimed the toy was a communist conspiracy to destroy the youth of America as the swiveling of hips was deemed obscene. This was at the tail end of the McCarthy period.

Sales of Hula Hoops collapsed.

They cancelled the order for 50 million oak corks, which were thrown overboard mid-Atlantic. They are still floating out there somewhere today. Wham-O almost went bankrupt from the experience but was eventually saved by the Frisbee.

Richard Knerr died in 2008 at the age of 82. Wham-O was taken over by Mattel in 1995. For his obituary, please click here.

April Nonfarm Payroll Report is a huge disappointment, at 266,000 when up to one million was expected. April’s hiring boom goes bust. March was revised down massively, from 916,000 to 770,000. The headline Unemployment Rate rose to 6.1%. It was one of the most confusing reports in recent memory. Bonds rocketed, interest rates crashed, and tech stocks took off like a scalded chimp. Inflation expectations have been shattered. Leisure & Hospitality kicked in at 331,000. But Professional & Business Services collapsed by 111,000. The two million businesses that went under last year aren’t hiring. Much of the return to work has been by people who already have jobs.

Weekly Jobless Claims plunged to 488,000, one of the sharpest drops on record at 100,000. Go down any Main Street today and instead of a sea of plywood, it is plastered with “Help Wanted” signs. Productivity is soaring, while average labor costs are actually falling.

ADP Private Employment Report soars, up by 742,000 in April, the biggest gain since September. It makes the coming Friday Nonfarm Payroll Report look outstanding. The jobs market is booming, but competition for the top jobs is also fierce.

Europe’s Q1 GDP falls by 0.6%. That’s better than expected, but disastrous when compared to America’s spectacular 6.4% print. Blame the bumbled slow-motion vaccine rollout. European governments wasted time negotiating on price like it was just another government program, while the US poured billions into vaccine makers, no questions asked. European vaccines, like Astra Zeneca’s, were flawed. It’s amazing that a big government continent can’t perform a big government task, even when millions of lives depend on it.

US Factory Orders gain, up 1.1% in March, providing more evidence that stimulus is working. Most economists are expecting double-digit growth in Q2. Driving up to Lake Tahoe, the number of trucks on the road has doubled in the last month.

Personal Income Explodes, up 21.1% in March, the most since 1945 according to the Bureau of Economic Analysis. What the heck happened in 1945? $1,400 stimulus checks are clearly burning holes in the pockets of consumers. Expect all numbers to hit lifetime highs in the coming months. The sun, moon, and stars are all lining up and standard of living is soaring.

Chicago PMI rockets to a 40-year high, up to 72.1 versus an expected 65. It seems everyone is already trying to buy what I am trying to buy. My bet is that the stock market is wildly underestimating the coming onslaught of economic numbers and will go to new highs once it figures out the game.

Lumber Prices are becoming a big deal, soaring 70% in two months and a staggering 340% in a year, igniting inflation fears. It’s only a tiny fraction of our tiny spending but is adding $36,000 to the cost of a new home. Someone in four homes sold today are newly built, the highest ratio ever. Punitive Trump lumber tariffs against Canada years ago shut down a lot of production and now that we need it, it isn’t there.

IBM brings out the 2-Nanometer Chip, taking semiconductor technology to the next evolutionary level. Any smaller and electrons will be too big to squeeze through the gates. The current battle is over 7 nm technology. It promises to bring much faster computing at a lower price and will act as a temporary bridge to lightening quantum computing.

When we come out the other side of pandemic, we will be perfectly poised to launch into my new American Golden Age, or the next Roaring Twenties. With interest rates still at zero, oil cheap, there will be no reason not to. The Dow Average will rise by 400% to 120,000 or more in the coming decade. The American coming out the other side of the pandemic will be far more efficient and profitable than the old. Dow 120,000 here we come!

My Mad Hedge Global Trading Dispatch profit reached 2.38% gain during the first week of May on the heels of a spectacular 15.67% profit in April.

I took profits in my long in Goldman Sachs (GS) and my short in the United States Treasury Bond Fund (TLT). I then plowed the cash into a new June short position in the (TLT) and a new short in the S&P 500 (SPY). That gave me a heart attack on my bond shorts when bond prices soared and then an immediate rebirth when they collapsed two points in the afternoon.

That leaves me 100% invested, as I have been for the last six months.

My 2021 year-to-date performance soared to 62.14%. The Dow Average is up 14.45% so far in 2021.

That brings my 11-year total return to 484.89%, some 2.00 times the S&P 500 (SPX) over the same period. My 11-year average annualized return now stands at an unbelievable 42.45%, easily the highest in the industry.

My trailing one-year return exploded to positively eye-popping 127.09%. I truly have to pinch myself when I see numbers like this. I bet many of you are making the biggest money of your long lives.

We need to keep an eye on the number of US Coronavirus cases at 32.7 million and deaths topping 581,000, which you can find here. New cases are in free fall, with only 12 here in Washoe County Nevada out of a population of 500,000. We could approach zero by the summer.

The coming week will be weak on the data front.

On Monday, May 10, at 9:45 AM, the April ISM New York Index is out. Roblox (RBLX) and BioNTech (BNTX) report earnings.

On Tuesday, May 11, at 10:00 AM, the NFIB Small Business Optimism Index for April is released. Palantir reports results (PLTR).

On Wednesday, May 12 at 2:00 PM, the US Core Inflation Rate for April is published. Softbank (SFTBY) reports results.

On Thursday, May 13 at 8:30 AM, the Weekly Jobless Claims are published. Walt Disney (DIS), Airbnb (ABNB), and Alibaba (BABA) report results.

On Friday, May 14 at 8:30 AM, Retail Sales for April are indicated. At 2:00 PM, we learn the Baker-Hughes Rig Count.

As for me, I’ve found a new series on Amazon Prime called Yellowstone. It is definitely NOT PG-rated, nor is it for the faint of heart. But it does remind me of my own cowboy days.

When General Custer was slaugherted during his last stand in Montana at the Little Big Horn in 1876, my ancestors spotted a great buying opportunity. They used the ensuing panic to pick up 50,000 acres near the Wyoming border for ten cents an acre.

Growing up as the oldest of seven kids, my parents never missed an opportunity to farm me out with relatives. That’s how I ended up with my cousins near Broadus, Montana for the summer of 1967.

When I got off the Greyhound bus in nearby Sheridan, I went into a bar to call my uncle. The bartender asked his name and when I told him “Carlat”  he gave me a strange look.

It turned out that My uncle killed someone in a gunfight in the street out front a few months earlier, which was later ruled self-defense. It was the last public gunfight seen in the state, and my uncle hadn’t been seen in town since.

I was later picked up in a beat-up Ford truck and driven for two hours down a dirt road to a log cabin. There was no electricity, just kerosene lanterns and a propane-powered refrigerator.

Welcome to the 19^th century!

I was hired on as a cowboy, lived in a bunkhouse with the rest of the ranch hands, and was paid the princely sum of a dollar an hour. I became popular by reading the other cowboys' newspapers and their mail since they were all illiterate. Every three days, we slaughtered a cow to feed everyone on the ranch. I ate steak for breakfast, lunch, and dinner.

On weekends, my cousins and I searched for Indian arrowheads on horseback, which we found by the shoebox full. Occasionally, we got lucky finding an old rusted Winchester or Colt revolver just lying out on the range, a remnant of the famous battle 90 years before. I carried my own six-shooter to help reduce the local rattlesnake population.

I really learned the meaning of work and had callouses on my hands in no time. I had to rescue cows trapped in the mud (stick a burr under their tail), round up lost ones, and saw miles of fence posts. When it came time to artificially inseminate the cows with superior semen from Scotland, it was my job to hold them still. It was all heady stuff for a 16-year-old.

The highlight of the summer was participating in the Sheridan Rodeo. With my uncle, one of the largest cattle owners in the area, I had my pick of events. So, I ended up racing a chariot made from an old oil drum, team roping (I had to pull the cow down to the ground), and riding a Brahma bull. I still have a scar on my left elbow from where a bull slashed me, the horn pigment clearly visible.

I hated to leave when I had to go home and back to school. But I did hear that the winter in Montana is pretty tough.

It was later discovered that the entire 50,000 acres was sitting on a giant coal seam 50 feet thick. You just knocked off the topsoil and backed up the truck. My cousins became millionaires. They built a modern four-bedroom house closer to town with every amenity, even a big screen TV. My cousin built a massive vintage car collection.

During the 2000s, their well water was poisoned by a neighbor’s fracking for natural gas, and water had to be hauled in by truck at great expense. In the end, my cousin was killed when the engine of the classic car he was restoring fell on top of him when the rafter above him snapped.

It all did give me a window into a lifestyle that was then fading fast. It’s an experience I’ll never forget.

Stay healthy.

John Thomas
CEO & Publisher
The Diary of a Mad Hedge Fund Trader